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Chicken-Fried News: Consecrated copulation




Well, that’s one way to do it.

An Oklahoma City bicycle cop came upon a religious ceremony of sorts as Latoya Jewel Gaede, 23, and Christopher Eugene Randles, 24, attempted to convert part of Film Row to “Indian land” through the ancient art of copulation, recently reported.

During a routine patrol, the officer observed the somewhat less routine sight of Gaede and Randles allegedly having sex about 10 feet from the road near the 800 block of W. Sheridan Avenue.

Upon approach, the blessed pair hastily attempted to dress, though the officer spotted Randles’ underwear not-so-carefully hidden inside a metal pole.

Gaede allegedly told police, “I am Indian and consecrating the ground, as this is now Indian land,” according to

They were arrested on complaints of disorderly conduct. Hopefully they were processed into different cells, or else the Oklahoma County Jail might also be consecrated “Indian land,” too.

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