Four hours, 22 booths and about 10,000 calories later, we finished our odyssey of fair food. We may never eat again, but you can!

The state fair continues through Sunday. Put on your eatin’ pants and join us.

by the fervor for fair food, I think we’re missing a passage from the
Bible. I’ll go ahead and paraphrase for God on this one: And lo, ye
shall put that bacon in the fryer and it shall be yummy. And woe to ye
who passeth up thy side of ranch dressing.

hours of working our way through the food of the fair, we tried bacon
in its many and varied forms, including rolled into a maple cinnamon bun
with bacon bits sprinkled on top. I honestly think Rod Lott considered
pushing kids out of the way for that one. (And he’s not the only one:
Sweet Shop’s bacon cinnamon roll won best sweet during the food vendors’

favorite find, however, had to be Kimmy’s Cupcakes. I tried the “hot
dog” cupcake that, thankfully, was wiener-free. Instead, it was a
vanilla cupcake “bun” hugging a chocolate frosting “dog” with vanilla
“mustard” on top.

Was it on a stick and deep-fried?

No. But Kimmy’s confections were adorably creative — and tasty! — and a stop at that booth is a must. —Jenny Coon Peterson

out there, somebody’s bucket list contains the line item “ingest a
turkey’s testicles.” Not mine — I have no bucket list, but if I did,
that now would be checked off. Thanks, Fire and Ice Concessions!

fail, the fair plays host to some rather interesting items, and not all
of them originally meant for sexual reproduction on the farm. For 
Nitro Ice Cream claims it has the smoothest ice cream around. That’s
because the machine in which it’s birthed utilizes liquid nitrogen (the
stuff Jason Voorhees uses to shatter a woman’s face in “Jason X”) and
spins it around at that fast and furious speed of 350 mph, yet somehow
doesn’t kill people. After being put in a freezer to warm it — yes, to
warm it — the scoops make for a tantalizing taste of sweets and science.
Pizza on a stick sounds like a lazy cop-out, but Swain’s Fine Foods’
offering of such is as big as a swollen foot, stuck on a piece of wood
somewhere between a paint stirrer and a paddle used for corporal
punishment. But the taste is all rewards of pepperoni, sausage and
enough stringy cheese to stop the monorail, should it go all

of unstoppable, Roadhouse Concessions’ Italiano Fire Sticks — just
imagine everything Italian rolled into one and covered in red breading —
are like a log of spice with a time-release system. —Rod Lott


the surname Carney, I’ve always prided myself on my ability to
metabolize even the most feared foodstuffs my deranged people can
concoct. But this year’s Oklahoma State Fair boasted a spread thateven a Sooner offensive lineman couldn’t scoff at.

don’t know if it’s physically possible to weep tears of bacon-flavored
maple cinnamon frosting, but that’s what my body felt like doing when it
sniffed the hot sauce from Harvell’s Ragin’ Cajun chicken on a stick.
Somehow spicy without sacrificing any of its savoriness, the sauce
dripped its way right down my throat and straight into my heart.

wonderful was the steak on a stick from Dean O Foods, which I chewed
with delight. But if you’re looking for something crunchy and sweet, I’d
recommend the Frenchee fried cheesecake from Topper Concessions, with
its flaky crust, dripping cherry sauce and powdered sugar. Year in and
year out, my family does junk food right. —Matt Carney

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