Having discovered I can read the minds of animals, I've started a new sideline as a ghostwriter. Here's an excerpt from an interview I did with Prestige, a potbellied pig born under the sign of Gemini.

*Brezsny:* What do you like best about being a potbellied pig?

*Prestige:* I'm greedy but cute. I get to eat like a pig, yet not be victimized by the negative judgments people usually project onto pigs.

*Brezsny:* Is there anything you're worried about?

*Prestige:* I need to make my caretaker understand that for the next few weeks we Geminis will need more than the usual amounts of food, love, presents, praise, attention, everything.

*Brezsny:* Anything you'd like to say to my Gemini readers?

*Prestige:* Don't let anybody make you feel guilty for wanting what you want.

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