After announcing his bid for Tom Coburn’s soon-to-be vacant senate seat, local Tea Partiers (not to be confused with “partiers”) launched an all-out assault on the fiery, redheaded Republican U.S. Representative of Oklahoma’s 5th District.

Apparently, gutting SNAP food stamp benefits, blaming gun violence on “welfare moms” and believing it should be legal to fire someone for being gay is not conservative enough for some people.

“While he may have only been in Washington, D.C. for a few years, Lankford has sure learned to do the ‘D.C. two-step’ pretty well,” Matthew Vermillion, President of OKforTEA and Oklahoma State Coordinator for Tea Party Patriots, said.

“Rather than answer for his liberal record, he tries to deflect the criticism by saying only people in Washington have a problem with his record. Nothing can be further from the truth.”

What the … what? “Lankford
is slowly bankrupting our country rather than making the tough fiscal
decisions to bring our financial house in order,” Vermillion said.

Psh. Boooooriiiiiing. Heard
that one before, Vermillion. Be honest; you’re jealous of his vivacious
red mop. That’s probably the most liberal thing about the guy, and even
that’s pretty stiff.

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