Food & Drink » Gazedibles

OKG Eat: Fries, guys

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Despite being carb sticks bathed in fat and salt, french fries are surprisingly dainty little things: thin, crisp, dipped in “fancy catsup,” like they’re the Queen of England. But across the metro, freedom fighters are taking it to their fries with heavy artillery, slathering them in sauces galore and turning finger food into fork food ... if you’re fancy.

— by Greg Elwell,

photos by Garett Fisbeck and Mark Hancock

2nd St. Poutine at Slaughter's Hall in Oklahoma City, Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2015. - GARETT FISBECK
  • Garett Fisbeck
  • 2nd St. Poutine at Slaughter's Hall in Oklahoma City, Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2015.

Slaughter’s Hall

221 N. Central Ave.

slaughtershall.com

606-6063

Founded by Sgt. Slaughter (Editor’s note: No, it wasn’t.), Slaughter’s Hall used to be a mess hall for G.I. Joes (Editor’s note: It was a famous jazz venue.), and it’s still making America proud (Editor’s note: I’ll let this one slide.) with its 2nd St. Poutine: beer-battered fries, pastrami and locally made cheese curds doused in country gravy. It’s a meal disguised as an appetizer and a reminder of when we beat Canada in WWII. (Editor’s note: LOL.)

Tequila Sun-Fryz at Guyutes, 12-16-15. - MARK HANCOCK
  • Mark Hancock
  • Tequila Sun-Fryz at Guyutes, 12-16-15.

Guyutes

730 NW 23rd St.

guyutes.com

702-6960

According to people who like music, the Tequila SunFryz at Guyutes are named for some kind of song or band or something. It doesn’t matter. You could be Bizzaro Jerry Garcia and these would still be the best things you put in your face all day. A big batch of golden waffle fries with pulled pork, queso, jalapeño, tomatoes, onions and cilantro crema on top, crowned with a sunny-side-up egg. Your stomach will say, “[insert phrase heard at Phish concert here]!”

Bomber Fries at Akropolis, 1809 S. Air Depot in Midwest City, Oklahoma, 12-16-15. - MARK HANCOCK
  • Mark Hancock
  • Bomber Fries at Akropolis, 1809 S. Air Depot in Midwest City, Oklahoma, 12-16-15.

Akropolis

1809 S. Air Depot Blvd. 733-1323

The makers of ketchup would like to apologize for not knowing that tzatziki sauce was a thing when they decided on their red, tomato-y, vinegar and sugar ooze. That error has been remedied by Akropolis and its Bomber Fries: a big basket of fries covered in spicy Greek yogurt sauce and feta cheese. It’s like My Big Fat Greek Wedding if it was edible and went well with a large cola.

White Trash Nachos at Irma's Burger Shack in Oklahoma City, Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2015. - GARETT FISBECK
  • Garett Fisbeck
  • White Trash Nachos at Irma's Burger Shack in Oklahoma City, Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2015.

Irma’s Burger Shack

1035 NW 63rd St.

irmasburgershack.com

840-4762

The secret origin story of White Trash Nachos is one of my favorite tales of Irma’s Burger Shack. Apparently, the staff were broke and wanted Mexican food, but they couldn’t leave the restaurant. So they improvised this mélange of french fries, beans, cheese, grilled chicken, tomato, sour cream, onions and jalapeños to sate their desires until they could get to some enchiladas. The result: pure, delicious genius.

Cheese fries at Toby Keith's I Love This Bar & Grill, 12-16-15. - MARK HANCOCK
  • Mark Hancock
  • Cheese fries at Toby Keith's I Love This Bar & Grill, 12-16-15.

Toby Keith’s I Love This Bar & Grill

310 Johnny Bench Drive

tobykeithsbar.com

231-0254

Why does Toby Keith’s still call them “freedom fries”? It’s not 2003 anymore. Besides, if you order the cheese fries at this Bricktown eatery, they’re really not free. The poor fries are smothered with jack and cheddar cheeses and then trapped under bacon, caged by sour cream and shackled by a sprinkling of green onions. The only way to set them free is to help them embrace oblivion inside your stomach, you patriot.

The Horseshoe at The Drum Room in Oklahoma City, Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2015. - GARETT FISBECK
  • Garett Fisbeck
  • The Horseshoe at The Drum Room in Oklahoma City, Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2015.

The Drum Room

4309 N. Western Ave.

drumroomokc.com

604-0990

Maybe they call it The Horseshoe because you’re testing your luck. Sure, one of The Drum Room’s thick waffles, covered in a one-third-pound burger (or some fried chicken, as we ordered it), steak fries, cheese and gravy sounds like you’ve hit the jackpot. But maybe it’s better to share the luck, because this is a massive pile of food. Perhaps if you’re as hungry as a horse, you can finish it all, but no one expects you to run the derby after all that.

Full Smoked Haystack at Blu's BBQ and Burgers, across from the Oklahoma National Memorial and Museum in Downtown Oklahoma City, 12-17-15. - MARK HANCOCK
  • Mark Hancock
  • Full Smoked Haystack at Blu's BBQ and Burgers, across from the Oklahoma National Memorial and Museum in Downtown Oklahoma City, 12-17-15.

Blu’s Bar-B-Q & Burgers

612 N. Robinson Ave.

okcbbq.com

602-2587

Gather ’round the campfire, pardners, and I’ll tell you the tale of The Smoked Haystack. ’Twas a night much like this one, when the sun was shining and people were in offices — daytime — when I wandered into Blu’s and saw the most frightenin’ sight I ever done saw. The fries were stacked high and covered in brisket, beans, jalapeños, onions and cheese. I done ate that mess, but I forgot my heartburn medication. It was harrowin’.

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