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Oklahoma City Fire Department releases \"helpful\" winter tips

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Brrr, is it ever cold out! But, why? Winter? What is this "winter" of which you speak?
Lucky for us, this mystery is cleared up by the Oklahoma City Fire Department, which faxed a three-page tip sheet to aid those of us experiencing such an alien concept for the first time.
Among its many revelations:

""Dress warm and in layers if venturing outside during cold weather."
""If possible, avoid driving while streets are covered in ice and snow."
""Extinguish all smoking materials before fueling."
""Turn off the engine while fueling."
""Keep all combustible materials off of floor furnaces."
""Remember to open the damper before lighting the fireplace."
""If you need to warm a vehicle, remove it from the garage immediately after starting it."
""Never use your oven to heat your home."

The hell? Next thing you know, you're going to tell me not to grill my burgers indoors! What are you, socialists? Oh, there it is: "Only use barbecue grills "¦ outside. Never use them in the home."

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