Boy, you never run out of things to report with Brent Rinehart in office. That's why we at CFN are secretly sorry he's facing charges that could chuck him outta there like four-day-old fish.
Rinehart's latest antic is the circulation of a re-election brochure " and we're using that term loosely " compelling voters to re-elect him for another action-packed term.
The brochure features comic book characters. Caricatures might be a better term. The comic book pamphlet is just about the oddest election gimmick we've seen so far " a cross between one of those religious comics you find on the floor of the bus stop men's room and probably what you'd find on the walls of the bus stop men's room.
It depicts line drawings of a person " we're guessing Rinehart " stating his campaign platform and narrated by a would-be constituent in overalls. The hilarity continues with Satan starring as a villain, an angel playing the cheerleader role and "homosexuals" dressed up in togas (a Greek chorus?) opposing Rinehart. And, don't forget the lengthy section depicting Oklahoma County Sheriff John Whetsel saying goofy stuff.
"I'm here to make sure the truth is told!" chirps the angel.
"The truth is the last thing I need," snarks Satan, replete with horns, fangs and a pitchfork. "I have tried and tried to disparage his character."
The comic is littered with misspelled words and grammatical errors " but it sure doesn't keep it from being entertaining "¦ not unlike the candidate. Oddly, the comic misspells pedophile. Twice.
The booklet tends heavily to focus on Rinehart's obsession with gays. Narrated by (we guess) a "typical" male voter, wearing overalls, the man proclaims, "Brent fought to remove homosexual preferences from the county handbook, but it was voted down by the Good Ol' Boys."
"If I can get kids to believe homosexuality is normal!" Satan exclaims, incompletely.
"Hey, Satan. Not with Brent around you won't!" counters the angel. Missing are the angel's next few lines: He can do it, yes he can! If he can't do it, no one can!
We wonder, will Satan get those kids to believe it's normal for Rinehart to be facing perjury, money laundering and conspiracy charges? That's what Oklahoma Attorney General Drew Edmondson reports. Edmondson's actions are disparaged in the comic as a "pedifile's (sic) dream come true."
If the comic book ain't enough, Rinehart also took the step of appointing notorious OKC disc jockey Mark Shannon to a board overseeing the transfer of the abandoned General Motors plant to Tinker Air Force Base.
Shannon's Web site " which speaks highly of Rinehart's comic " also includes such gems as racial jokes about Chinese people and referring to Barack Obama as "B. Hussein Obama."
Shannon notes on his Web site: "Noticed that I serve at the pleasure of the person who appointed me, who was Commissioner Brent Rinehart. Commissioner Rinehart is up for election. If he loses, I leave the oversight committee."