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Reasonable doubt

Deezy’s five-song video EP Aporia second-guesses the meaning of success.


Aporia is about questioning whether the sacrifices made for success are actually worth it. - SIKE IMAGES / PROVIDED
  • SIKE Images / provided
  • Aporia is about questioning whether the sacrifices made for success are actually worth it.

aporia – noun 1. An irresolvable internal contradiction or logical disjunction in a text, argument, or theory 2. The expression of doubt

 “Anybody that’s out here working, trying to pursue your goals or chasing after success, sometimes you don’t know what comes with that until you get there, and then once you get there, you might start questioning whether you want it as bad as you thought you did,” Oklahoma City hip-hop artist Deezy, aka James Curd, said.

Deezy began releasing five-song video EP Aporia, the followup to 2017’s Evolve or Decay (E.O.D.),  Tuesday. Viewed together, the videos, filmed by Imageline Studio with financial backing from sponsor Krow’s Nest BBQ and Catering, will tell a complete story.

“It’s really just talking about what it’s like being in a relationship and being an artist or chasing after success and what comes with that, some of the situations we deal with going after that success,” Deezy said, “real situations that I’ve dealt with as an artist … being out late, having events come up all the time, and on top of that, I’m still working a regular job at the same time, so I might be gone all day. It takes away from me being able to be around my kids, sometimes, going to so many events and stuff like that, being pulled away from that.”

Creative director Nicole Allen-Fisher, who helped Deezy fine-tune the storyline and concept, said the album’s theme of self-doubt and internal conflict in the pursuit of success is “not just about rapping” and “so relatable to so many people.”

“When I heard the word ‘aporia’ and looked it up, I was like, ‘Oh my god, that’s like my whole life,’” Allen-Fisher said. “We’re always caught in some sort of quandary that makes us ask, ‘Do we really want to be where we are and do we really want to keep going where we’re going?’”

 Though Deezy is continuing to pursue greater success, he has already faced challenges balancing his private and artistic lives. 

“Getting to the point where I’m being played on the radio consistently, being on the news, having more exposure is creating a lot more of a demand on my time, and being gone more and really trying to stay consistent with the level that I’m at and continue to get to a higher level, there’s new things coming with that and it’s definitely caused some strain,” Deezy said. “Even shooting the video, some of the storyline that we did caused some issues. I don’t want to give too much of the storyline away, but just shooting with some of the females that was in the video, it wasn’t anything too crazy but just being in that setting with somebody in lingerie and stuff like that, if you’re in a relationship, that kind of raises some eyebrows a little bit. … It’s a little bit over-exaggerated, the situation, but in the process of trying to shoot it, it created exactly what I’m talking about in the video.”

Working on Aporia with Deezy gave Allen-Fisher a better appreciation of some of the issues that inspired it.

“When you finally get what you want, or you get close to getting what you want, you never really imagine what the problems and the issues that arise will be,” Allen-Fisher said. “Other people can tell you what they’ve been through, but until you get there, it’s very difficult for you to know. Just even watching Deezy himself go through the stages of being recognized on the street or having literal fans when we go to other places and laughing about his [direct messages on social media] or things like that … and that actually having some sort of tangible effect on his relationship and his life and all of the different decisions on where he’s going to spend money and where’s the money going to come from to fund the project, and all of that, just watching him go through it, it’s like I’ve been seeing the project in real life.” 

Deezy released the first single from five-song video EP Aporia Tuesday. - SIKE IMAGES /  PROVIDED
  • SIKE Images / provided
  • Deezy released the first single from five-song video EP Aporia Tuesday.


“Doin Thangs”

The album, produced by Reggie Ganther of 778 Music Group, begins with an assessment of Deezy’s current situation, and despite the conflicts that follow, it ends with resolve to keep progressing.

“The first song is called ‘Doin Thangs,’ where I’m basically saying, I’ve made it to this level of success I was chasing after,” Deezy said. “I’m basically making that statement that I’m doing what I said I was going to do. Then, as you move on from there, it goes more into me looking at where I’m at and starting to realize how it’s affecting me and my relationship and stuff. And the last song is really the single. [‘Count It Up’] is me working it out and getting back to business.”

 The subject matter of his lyrics varies with his thoughts and feelings from day to day.

 “The majority of what I talk about is stuff that’s related to where I’m at in life or what I’m dealing with in my head, stuff like that,” Deezy said. “It just kind of depends on what the goal is with the song. I’m kind of all over the place with my content sometimes. … People, we’re not always in the same mood. We don’t always keep the same viewpoint on certain things. Some days you might feel super political, and other days you might just feel like partying and not really being on that vibe. I really embrace that aspect of myself and knowing that I’m not always in one mental space. … I think it helps me connect with a broader audience.”

Aporia’s songs were finished at the beginning of 2019, but filming the videos took a year.

 “We had a lot of hold-ups with getting certain venues,” Deezy said. “I had specific things that I wanted to do. One of the videos, we shot at a church, and I wanted the stained glass windows and all of that, and it was difficult finding a place that would let us come and shoot and not have to pay a ridiculous amount of money to make it happen. And people flaked out. We had to rework certain things in the storyline because of that, but we followed through. We made it happen.”

Though Allen-Fisher said the finished product “became something almost completely different” from the “huge idea” Deezy originally presented to her, his adaptability and commitment elevated Aporia to a level viewers and listeners might not expect. 

“It’s above and beyond what people are really doing, and I mean that on a national scale. I think he’s doing things that people will be copycatting in some way for sure,” Allen-Fisher said. “The great thing about Deezy as a performer, an artist, a visionary is that he finds opportunities wherever he goes. He’s always kind of double-mindedly doing both regular life and artist’s life at the same time, almost all the time. … He’s the real thing, the balance between somebody who talks about what they want to do but they also walk the walk of what they want to do and keep pushing the envelope and boundaries to get done what he wants to get done.”


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