Turns out, everything you need to know in life, you didn't learn in kindergarten. For example, when an off-his-rocker Michael Madsen wants to know if you the definition of "a brazen bull," you better damn well have the correct answer! I'll save you the Googling trouble: It's a torture device, and it ain't pretty.
"The Brazen Bull" is, naturally, a new horror picture starring and produced by Madsen, and it begs the question, "What won't Michael Madsen do?" I mean, 15 years ago, this guy was riding the wave of the indie-film movement as a go-to fave of Quentin Tarantino, and now he'll star in any movie, so long as it'll keep him fed in Swanson Hungry-Man dinners. I know a man's gotta eat, but his talents are too great to be wasted in dreck.
"Bull" isn't so bad that's it's total BS, but it's sure not good. Unsurprisingly, Madsen is the best thing in it, playing a psychotic killer who lives in the basement of abandoned real estate in L.A. "? the very property that too-young investor Lauren (Jennifer Tisdale) has the misfortune of checking out with her fianc