News » Chicken-Fried News

Zombie puppy



So here’s how the imminent apocalypse all began (in case you want to relay the tale to your scrappy group of survivors as you huddle, cold and hungry, around the meager fire at your hidden campsite completely surrounded by a wasteland teeming with brain-munching hordes of zombies): A black-and-white spotted puppy and his four siblings wound up at a Sulphur animal shelter, according to New York Daily News (and ABC, and Fox and pretty much every news outlet out there). Because of over-crowding at the shelter and because a vet declared the puppies sick, all five of the 3-month-old puppies were euthanized.

Not only euthanized, but checked and confirmed to be deceased and then put in a trash bin. But between the Saturday date with death and Sunday morning, something happened, according to NYDN. No one knows what, exactly, but we’re going to go ahead and assume it had to do with black magic and possibly necromancy.

Maybe a voodoo priestess. Anyway, an animal control worker took a little lookee-loo inside the trash bin Sunday morning, and what do you suppose he found? That’s right: zombie puppy.

An Oklahoma vet took the risen puppy home (acting, some would say, with a foolish innocence) and is trying to find the undead guy a home. She’s even named him Wall-E. What? So we’re dealing with not just a zombie uprising, but a robot zombie uprising?

Xenu save us.

Add a comment